That's it. It's over. I can't deal. I'm dead. I won't be writing anymore 'cause it doesn't seem to bring anything else than trouble and pain. I'm done. People don't know how to leave well enough alone and just let me express myself without having to think about what 'might' happen or what they 'might' think. You're thinking “stupid child, this is the Internet”. Exactly, this is the Internet. I have a pseudonym and still, people come to me and bitch about what I write. I'm not doing this for any of you, I'm doing this for me. This blog is for me. It's been a place where I thought I could vent and just say whatever, but when people overanalyse every single one of my words and start picking at it, that's when I know I have to quit, and that's what I'm about to do. Formal and only polite apologies to the world, you don't deserve to read what I have to say. You can't proprely handle what I have to say and recognise how untouchable and pure it is. Goodbye and goodnight, no regrets. .....Alexandre Pierre, 23rd of October 2009.

P.S: The site will stay open, but I won't be adding new articles. Leave comments, read it over again, I don't care. This isn't my mess anymore. I'm sorry to the ones who liked to read me and who respected the boundaries of my art. This isn't particularly your fault, but it still could be anybody's. Sincerest apologies to you my friends, I hope you know who you are.
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# Posté le vendredi 23 octobre 2009 20:49

royal decree.

royal decree.
i'm tired of running but too scared to stop.
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# Posté le samedi 17 octobre 2009 14:12

I FEEL LIKE BITCHING, I NEED TO VENT.

I FEEL LIKE BITCHING, I NEED TO VENT.
----------------------------------------------RANT! RANT! RANT! Everything is shit. My head's been everywhere lately and I'm trying to catch myself on paper. Where to start, what to say, It's always the same questions and I just feel like laying it all out there. I'm feeling alone. Everywhere I look there seems to be someone crying or someone fighting or someone being in love. It's getting on my last nerve and I'm feeling random in all of this. I'm not saying I want to be part of the drama, far from it, I'm just saying It's taking over everyone but me and that makes me left out. Even my friends are sucked into this mess and despite what I might say here, I really love them. Here's the deal with my friends, some are being emotional for reasons I don't know, others' lovestruck and slightly depressed, one is completely AWOL and the rest are on the sidelines. But there's this thing who includes all of them and me who adds to the shittiness: I don't recognise my friends. I'm just sitting at lunch and am making conversation with them but in the back of my mind, I'm thinking "What the hell am I doing here?" No disrespect to my friends but hear me out. They're all about drugs and rock bands and guitars. They dress in black and in leather and wear band shirts. I have nothing against all of this, but what the hell man! That's so not me! Like really not me, and there's the whole theory of 'opposites attract' but still, being with them feels wierd. It feels like I was there but not at the right place, as If I was a mistake of some sort. Like today, all around me, they were singing Buckcherry lyrics together and I wasn't. I couldn't. It felt like intense randomness and insignificance. I felt like I should be somewhere else. What do we have in common anyway? Nothing. I guess they're the closest to artists I could find, they're musicians. Megan and Marie are artists, but they're freak artists so It's not the same thing. I know what I'm saying can sound harsh but that's not my intention. I'm just writing, venting what's passing through my head. I apologise if I offended any of my friends with this but It's the truth, I feel and am random in the gang. You guys might like it, but It's not so fun from over here. Why am I even complaining? I always feel alone, I've always been alone. I've never met anyone else like me and never felt in a group, I'm always an oddling. But people are always saying how cool and original and unique I am. It isn't all that great, It's alot of work actually. You have to accept who you are and be proud of that. You have to admit you don't blend in and comform. You have to admit you're not normal. I'd rather be myself than like everyone else, 'cause that's who I have to be, who I should be, who I am. I am me and sometimes it drives me crazy but right now, the world is driving me. I just want to be happy and enjoy myself. I want to feel free, but I'm so not. Fuck this. RANT!
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# Posté le samedi 26 septembre 2009 13:18

Modifié le dimanche 27 septembre 2009 21:42